My life changed when I was 16. Until then, I believed people were born the way they are — fixed and unchangeable. I was painfully shy and didn’t know how to talk to people (especially girls), so I did what felt natural: I searched the internet for answers. Found some cringe YouTube videos, and I tried following that advice. Even though it was cringeworthy and cheesy, I was somewhat able to talk to people.
And that small success shifted my whole perspective on life. I was no longer bound by who I was, but instead imagining what I could become. Eventually, I started exercising and learning more about self-improvement. And gradually, I began to see life differently.
I now firmly believe that anything and everything can be achieved by investing enough time and energy, be it a skill, physique, or personality. This is one of my favorite quotes of all time —
“Energy and Persistence Conquer All Things.”
—Benjamin Franklin
My goal is to give you what those videos gave me, not some generic advice, but a shift in perspective and huge possibilities. Let’s start.
Belief, Identity, and the Secret Sauce
What do you think is the fundamental difference between a successful person and one who is not? Luck, Opportunity, Hard work? The answer is none of them; hard work is subjective, and I would even argue that less successful people often work harder than those who are more successful.
What we call luck is being in the right place at the right time, but we always forget the crucial part, which is that you also have to be the right person to convert that ‘luck’ into an ‘opportunity’. If you are the right person with enough volume, you will get lucky.
That brings us to you. Who are you? What do you believe about yourself? Whatever it is- that is your Identity. Every decision you make and every action you take is based on that identity. If you believe “ I am bad at math,” you will not take any action to get better. If you believe “I am a timid person,” like I did, you will not try to improve.
You might have heard people say the above many times, but we are going deeper than that. Where did those beliefs come from? Our brain works on a ‘voting’ system. If you fail many times in a task, you start believing that you are not good at it. If you do a task well enough times, you believe that you might have talent in that field.
Your brain doesn’t store nuance — it stores patterns, and most of these beliefs are installed in us from a young age. The thing you failed at many times when you were young- maybe you can do it now. But once that belief is there, it’s hard to even think about it. Think of a thing that you are very bad at. Why? When you ask that question and try to get to the bottom of this, you won’t find a good answer.
When you stop and consider things that you believe are impossible for you to achieve, there are no fundamental reasons you’ll find that they are. Sure, some things might be harder than others, but they are certainly possible. What is important is not the thing itself, but the possibility that there are things that you believe are impossible but are actually possible.
Your beliefs influence your identity, and you take actions based on that identity that reinforce (cast ‘votes’ ) for those beliefs. This is a feedback loop that keeps you stuck exactly where you are. 50% of the work is convincing yourself that- “becoming a billionaire”, “going to space”, “running a business”, “being fit”, or [ insert any goal ] is possible.
The fundamental difference between a VERY successful person and an unsuccessful one is their Space of Possibilities, their Ambition, and their ability to believe in themselves.
So I would encourage you to challenge yourself with an IMPOSSIBLE task and really try to achieve it. You will be amazed by the person you become and the magic you will create on the way.✨